The past few months have been difficult. If you've been following my blog you know that my family and I have experienced a huge life change. My athiest mother-in-law has moved into our home. To say she is difficult is the most huge understatement in the world. It's been especially hard for me and in the process I've made it even more difficult.
Let me explain. I have basically turned my house over to her. It's been easier to let her just take over than to stand up and tell her no. This wimpy act of mine has turned our home into a place that is not the sanctuary it was intended to be (and always has been before this). If she was difficult about something or said a cruel comment about something, I would determine to not do that thing that created the cruel comment. Just call me spineless.
I was having an especially hard day last week and in the midst of it, I received an unexpected call from my sister. I was lamenting my situation and my sister told me in no uncertain terms to "take your house back"! She told me what she would do and how she would handle it. At first I thought, "I can't do that" but the more she talked, the more I saw the wisdom in her words. She reminded me that this is Spiritual warfare and as such, I need to be prepared. My sister said things to me that no one else on this earth could say to me. I listened and I heeded her words. The past few days have been better. Yes, we're still having issues with the MIL, and we probably always will, but at least my house is my own again. Have I mentioned before how much I love my sister and how blessed I am that she is my sister?! If not, let me mention it again and again!
I can't emphasize the importance of getting into the Word every day in a situation like this. Along with that, I'm now playing Praise and Worship music in my house - all day long. I pray over my house and have a lot of prayer warriors that are in prayer with me, too. I am like that woman in the picture above. The Word of God is my sword and I am praying for strength that only the Holy Spirit can give me through Christ. With God all things are possible.
I'm still decluttering. Yes, it's true. I have years and years of clutter to deal with. However, I have several boxes to donate and have filled many trash bags with paperwork that I no longer need. I've donated perfectly good magazines to my local library for them to resell and make money for the library. We have a wonderful library and my family benefits so much from it, so to give back a little is the least I can do. It's a good feeling to have space and organization where there was none before.
I had great fun a couple of weeks ago, too, when I went to my decorative painting club. We painted the most gorgeous leaves on ovals and then will put the ovals on a long plaque. It's hard to describe here, but suffice to say it's one of my all time favorite pieces and I will share a picture as soon as I'm finished with it. It's been so wonderful getting back to my club again. I've missed it and all the fun ladies that are a part of the group. We giggled and laughed and ate and painted. What could be better?
It's been a hard month, too, though. I came to the end of a friendship. I could see it coming and I knew I was going to have to make a hard decision, but it didn't make it any easier nonetheless. I could see the Lord preparing my heart and I had my hubby say something about the friendship, which he never does, and so it really got my attention. When my husband speaks about a concern or has a warning for me, I definitely listen to him. He very rarely does that so it really makes me pay attention. I am hurt by the way I and my family was treated by my friend and her family. It was basically the final straw and I knew I needed to move on. Why do these things have to happen, though? Definitely a breaking and a growing time in my life.
I started my leadership classes at church last Saturday. I'm going to be involved in the women's ministry at my church and I'm so excited I can hardly stand it. I see the Lord opening so many doors for me and I'm so thrilled to be able to pursue the Word of the Lord the way I really want to do. I laugh because a year ago I was wondering what in the world I was going to do with myself now that I wasn't homeschooling now. God had a plan all along. He has opened so many new things to me and I'm busier now than ever. It's a good busy, though. I'm working in the things of His ministry which I've felt called to do for a long time now, plus I'm pursuing my writing and art more, too. Those are gifts that He has given me and I'm really working at doing them for Him. It's just wonderful.
Yes, I'm still having pain issues. I've resigned myself to the fact that I probably always will unless the Lord performs a miracle. My arthritis is getting worse and my back seems to have really bad days, too. My knees are shot and now I'm dealing with diverticulitis. However, that's all part of the Lord's plan, too. I'm not sure why but I know that none of us is immune to the difficulties of life or of aging. I have to trust in the Lord to get me through and also to face the fact that I will just need to take a pill so I can do the things He's called me to do. If Paul had his thorn in the flesh, why wouldn't I? I'm certainly no Paul but I'm striving to do the work God has called me to do, the same as Paul. God provided for Paul and He will provide for me, too.
God bless you - Julie
I do remember this post, now. I don't know why then I dind't comment on it, then.
ReplyDeleteLOL - it's okay, Kristy. I think we both have a lot going on and it's hard to keep everything straight. Take care, my friend.
ReplyDeleteLove ya - Julie
Oh goodness, so many things going on in and around you...I will definitely keep you in my prayers! You are strong and have done well, and sometimes a word or two from loved ones helps guide our way. Thank God, He gives them the words and relationship to help us!
ReplyDeleteHello my dear Julie,
ReplyDeleteI am catching up from being away from my computer for so long. You have had such change in your life...but your light still shines my dear friend...you may feel week but you are strong in Him. The Lord is giving you new ways to serve Him...and that is so exciting. I am sorry that your health has been poor...but your thankful heart shines through.
God bless you,
Joyce
I could relate to a lot on this update! (I don't have the MIL issue, but I have other issues with some family members.)
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I go to a support group called "Living Free" (it used to be called Celebrate Recovery) and I am in the group for codependents. I am currently reading a book called "Boundaries" by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend. Your sister gave you the right advice! If you have the opportunity, I would encourage you to get this book from your Christian bookstore and read it. It is really helping me (along with the support group), to establish boundaries that I lost a long time ago.
I also can relate to your pain. I have a herniated disc and a bulging disc in my lower back and am now going through pain throughout my body. I see a specialist this month to find out what it is. I do know it is not rheumatoid arthritis because I had lab work done. Hopefully she will be able to help find out what is wrong.
I take tramadol for pain. I hate it, but I hate the pain worse. I also pray for God to heal me and I know He is able. But until I am healed, His grace will be sufficient.
I am new to blogging and am really enjoying your honesty. Thanks for sharing!
Be blessed,
Sue