Thursday, August 22, 2013

New Attitude

I'm sure, like me, many of you don't feel exactly strong on some days. I definitely felt that way yesterday. As you know, I had my sleep study on Tuesday night. I had very high hopes that they would find out what they needed to know and that I would be fitted with a mask that night. Unfortunately, that didn't happen. I was able to fall asleep quite quickly, but I woke up after two hours in pain, despite the fact that I had taken a pain pill just before bed. I had to call out to the tech and move to the other side of the bed. I don't think I've shared here that I can't roll over in bed. My back won't allow this, so if I want to sleep in a different position, I have to get up and go around to the other side of the bed and lay on the other side. I got all comfy and it took me forever to go back to sleep. I finally did, but before I knew it, it was 5:00 am (another patient was talking loudly in the hall and that's why I woke up) and, even though I had until 6:00 am, I just never could get back to sleep. I knew when I woke up at 5:00, that my test had not gone as I had hoped. They told me that if I fell asleep in the first couple of hours and my symptoms were obvious, they would fit me with a mask. However, I didn't really start having my symptoms until after 2:30 am, and by that time it was too late. I sat there in tears as the tech came in to unhook all the wires (27 in all!). He couldn't tell me much but he said he would be surprised if I wasn't diagnosed as having sleep apnea, however, it will be another possible 2 weeks before I know for sure! To say I was devastated is an understatement. I had such high hopes that I would get help on Tuesday night! I came home, took a shower to get all the gunk out of my hair, then promptly went to bed and slept until noon. I was very depressed and I let it wash over me all day on Wednesday. There's nothing more debilitating than a good pity party!

Thursday morning I woke up and decided I could either continue living out my pity party or I could just work through the exhaustion and live my life. I chose the later. I got dressed right away today and even put on makeup! I used to always, always put on makeup, but I've gotten lazy about it over the past 3 years about it at home. I digress...I started working on my family room and I'm happy to say, I pretty much finished it! I still have a few pictures to put up, but it's just beautiful and I'm thrilled that I got it done!

Yes, the hard things that we have to deal with are hard, but I'm so glad that I woke up with a new attitude! I'm really tired of how I'm feeling - the exhaustion and the pain - but I'm even more tired of being down in the dumps! As far as the sleep study, I've completely turned that over to God and I will rely on Him to work everything out for me. To worry or fret about it will only drive me crazy and, honestly, I can't afford that! =D

Many blessings - Julie


  1. I love your new attitude! It's not always easy and I'm sorry your sleep study didn't go well.
    I have RA and my sleep is poor and uncomfortable.
    Sending you hugs and hope you have a good weekend (:

  2. Hang in there Julie. Have faith, and we will both keep on praying!!

  3. Yes, it's all about attitude! We have to learn to choose joy and rejoice in all circumstances. Have a great day! :)


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