Sunday, September 10, 2017

On The Outside Looking In - Or Rejection From Those We Love

There have been a lot of Princess Diana remembrance shows on to commemorate the twenty years since she was killed in that car accident. I remember that day like it was yesterday and shed more than a few tears for this woman who I felt best represented my grown up years. She was married the same year and me - only a couple months before me, in fact - she was the same age as me and was marrying an older man. She also had two boys that she loved dearly and so did I. I think what most made me love her is something other than the typical response as to why people loved her then and continue to love her now. My reason is because I knew that she knew what it was like to live in a family or have friendships where you didn't fit in or were rejected. She knew what it was like to be different and to be shunned for it. She knew what it was to have someone in her family who turned their back on her despite her loving him deeply. I often wonder how this couple, who were so obviously loving to each other here


Could go to two people who were obviously in their own thoughts and keeping as much distance as possible on this bench. The body language is undeniable. 



In this picture, they both look like they would like to start running away from each other! Their back on turned to each other and it's quite obvious that they have nothing to say and are keeping each other out of their lives. However, in a situation like this, there is always one who is the one in control and keeping the other in their place - by rejecting them. The rejected partner is then forced, at that point, to turn away from their rejector and wonder what's wrong with themselves, that they are being rejected and pushed out. 

Have you ever felt like the person looking in? Like you're the fish outside the fish bowl where everyone else is interacting and having fun but that you don't fit into the fish bowl. Your own option is to try and be a part of the fish bowl by watching and hoping that someday you will be invited in to the fish bowl. This fish bowl can be a family unit, a marriage, a group of women in a gathering, a church, your children, or anything else where the relationships are important to you.

I'll be honest. These situations can usually not be fixed especially if it's the family you grew up in. Those around you put you in your position within the family and you tend to stay there. However, there is one relationship where we are never just looking in and that's our relationship with Jesus. 

Jesus invites us in to have an intimate relationship with Him. He is always, always there for us and available for us to talk to every minute of the day and night. He cares more deeply for us - as we are - than anyone else. He offers us the love that we so deeply crave and the acceptance we long for. 

Will we never shed tears over the relationships that aren't want we want them to be? No. I have shed so many tears and will probably continue to do so. I do know that God cares about these tears and heartaches because He tells me so in Psalms 56:8, 

"You keep track of all my sorrows.
    You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
    You have recorded each one in your book."

He cares about our sorrows and His heart aches for us in our sorrows. He isn't some distant God that turns away like so many in our life. He truly cares and knows what it's like to weep with sorrow. (John 11:35)


If, like me, you are going through a situation like this or have for most of your life, I pray that you will turn to Jesus as He will never leave you. He loves you just as you are and will be the comfort for your heart that you need. If you need prayer over your situation, please let me know and I will pray for you as I hope you will pray for me. You can leave a comment or email me privately. My contact information is at the top of the page. God wants us to hold one another up in prayer and support each other. We can be the hands and feet of Jesus for each other through our prayers.

Blessings - Julie

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